i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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