This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
