just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
