i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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