Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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