suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
