That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
