dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
false alarm, still single
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
