No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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