so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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