I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I AM VODKA MAN
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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