who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
