Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
