so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
only if we run a train.
done.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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