Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
