Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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