try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize