cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
My bed smells like the plague
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
