Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize