i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
sex in a hospital.. check
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
