I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
