Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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