So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
do herpes really smell.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
