I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
