apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
