I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Randomize