Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
