It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
