I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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