If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i came on her dog
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
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