If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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