so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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