After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
