whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize