everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize