the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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