Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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