Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
