it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Randomize
