I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
