I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
