In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
