Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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