She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
