Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
