discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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