her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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