margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
