yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
