I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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