im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
