And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
